Thursday, February 08, 2007

I, Iraq

My memory is not that good nowadays, some friends suggested that I go visit a doctor to check my brain out. I don’t know if am going to the see the doctor or not, I still haven’t decided yet, but I would be much surprised if it turned out that I still have a brain at all, I think –and that’s only me, a crazy person talking- that humane beings consumes their brain during their lifetime on George W. Bush's not-so-green-due- to global-warming world. I am not a scientist, but if you have seen what we have seen since we were little children, I think you might understand what I'm talking about, and I wouldn't be a gibber jabber of a crazy man to you.
The first thing that comes to my mind is something happened 16 years ago, any of you remember Al-Amiryah shelter? More than 200 people died, their only fault is they were afraid of American bombs. Funny thing, I was watching a movie, a documentary of some kind, called the secret. The main theme is according to the law of attraction, what you think most happens to you. For example, if you are afraid of meeting bad people and you spend a lot of time thinking about, you are bound, by the law of attraction, to unconsciously attract these people to you. These people is Amriyah shelter were so afraid of shelter missiles and f-16 fighter bombers that they attracted these missiles to their shelter. Or maybe that’s only one way to put, another was is to say that the Americans thought the Iraqi high command were hiding in that shelter, or maybe you can say that they received some faulty inelegance information (surprise, surprise), or another way is to say that the weren't sure if the information were true or not so they bombed the place anyway. A friend of mine said some funny things the other day," one bullet in your head is enough to kill you, the second one is just to make sure".
They talked a lot about mass graves, crimes against humanity he said. I wish you would give that another thought Mr. President. But it not your fault anyway, not because you are stupid and you say only when they tell you to say, well… you are stupid, anyway, that’s not the point, the point is they didn't tell what really happened there. During the chaotic retreat from Kuwait, your fighters and helicopters killed everything with tow legs they could find walking on the ground. People found the bodies and buried them in mass graves. But then again, that's only one way to put it. The other way is to say that I am crazy Baathist, which I don’t mind at all. After all, I am crazy. Are you going to hang George bush senior for this? Crazy, crazy, crazy, just plain insane.
I am not good with faces or with people anyway. I don’t remember faces and names very well. The funny thing is that I remember many people I do not know, or even have see in my whole life. I remember more than 500,000 people, most of the children less than one year old, who died due the embargo. Don’t tell me its Saddam's fault, because my crazy diminished brain can't accept that. It can not accept that after all that, Mrs. Albright says it wasn't worth it. So the death of 500,000 people wasn't, after all, worth it. And all for what? For non-existent WMDs. Maybe that can't be held against them, because the only knew afterwards. You could say that 13 years is a lot of time, and you could say that the Iraqis kept telling you that they didn't have it, but still you can't hold that against America. The moral of this story is "Kill Now, Ask Questions Later".
Or "Kill people now; think why you killed them later. And if, after a long time, this reason didn't work out for you, just think of something else".
I am biased. I admit that. Because I always talk about America, and what America did to us, and how brutal her crimes were. But I never say anything about me, and how stupid I am, how ignorant and retarded I am, and how futile and idiotic my discussions are, how I don’t know how to debate in a civilized way. I never say that, do I?
God damn me and all the people who are like me. Have you watched me on TV? Yeah, don’t be surprised, I was on TV, I am on TV all the time. I was dead serious, but for some reason, people laugh at me all the time.
I am a member of the Iraqi parliament, and I am the head of it too. I can't agree on laws that matter to my people, but I can agree on laws that matter to me, like my salary and benefits. Sometimes, I say that terrorism comes from Syria. Some other times I say terrorism comes from Iran. Actually it depends on who I am at the particular moment. I leave the parliament on the when they don’t give my money, but I stay when people die every other day. Sometimes I need people to tell not to kill my brothers. What kind of crap is that anyway? Fatwas or religious orders from holy men to tell me that I cant kill my brother, and I if I did, I would go to hell. I don’t even have the common sense to realize that killing anybody is wrong, let alone killing my brother. The only thing that matters to me, the only things that is most important to me is ME, and only ME. When I go to my shaman to ask him about things that matter to me, it turns out that things that matter to me most is Anal sex and marrying more than one women to satisfy me. I debate with my peers over the validity of some kind of marriage that allows me to take as many women as I please without any obligations or consequences. And you say I don’t know how to Debate, HUH, in your face. I rage, demolish, destroy, kill, insult, boycott, threat, and demand explanations over some insulting cartoons, but I do nothing when they are destroying one of my holiest sights. I guess it is no longer my holiest sight; I have replaced it with my penis. I degrade and demean my women; I cover them with cloth from head to toe lest anybody sees them and realize what I had done to them. I kill them if the go against my will, I kill them If I even suspected that they went against my will. I am the Supreme Being; I am gods shadow on earth. My word is that last word, and no other word shall be said after mine. I twist religion to my benefit, when it's OK for me, I fight. When it isn't I don’t. And who says when its OK and when it isn't? Who the hell do you think? Me!!!
I can't get along with my brother when it comes to my country; it's my country, not his. But I can get along with him fine, when it comes to a football (or soccer) match. We laugh together if we win, we cry together if we lose. But when the math ends, when the referee blows his whistle, him and I go back to killing each other.
I need people to teach me everything I know, or every thing I should know, I can't just go and learn it my self. I am too tired to do it. The only thing I could of is what's for lunch today and which one my wives is going to satisfy me tonight.
I call other people monkeys and pigs, just because they don’t believe in what I believe, for I will prevail. I waged wars, I conquer lands, states, continents, but when other people do it, I call them invaders. But my god said I could, their god just doesn't matter.
When I learned democracy, my greatest achievement was a lynching. Yes, I finally learned democracy and humane rights, I finally learned how all people are equal under the law, and my first implication was a lynching. I finally formed a government; I finally elected my representatives, I am finally free from tyranny. And the first thing I do is an act of tyranny and revenge. I am so obsessed with revenge; it is the only thing I know how to do. I don’t know to build, I don’t know how to teach, I don’t know how to serve my kinsmen, I don’t know how to let go, I don’t how read, I don’t know how to do anything, I only know that I should get even with anybody, even with myself.
I kill myself and ask people why are they killing me, I see the wrong in them, but I don’t see the wrong in me. I am a hypocrite.
I.... I... I... I don’t who "I" is. This person is a stranger to me; my own mother doesn't recognize me anymore. My own mother doesn't know me anymore. I am killing my mother, my brother is killing my mother, the stranger is killing my mother, I am killing the stranger, I am killing my brother, my brother is killing me.
Silly me, stupid me, please forgive me.
I apologize if I offended anyone. I have a good excuse anyway, I am losing my mind, remember? I have lost most of my brain, and the rest is just trying to control my bodily functions. I have lost my mind; seriously, I think I am a country. I am torn, hurt, killed, raped, wounded, bleeding, empty, and lost country. This is the craziest thing i have ever said to the day. I am Iraq. I, Iraq.


At 2:38 AM, Blogger 3EERAQIMEDIC said...

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